Shoulda, Coulda

Hello!

Oh my goodness, so on my last post I had a few spelling errors, embarrassing! I was so excited to finally get my post up there, I didn't even take the time to reread it. Lesson learned, I'll be sure to reread my writings now, forgive me :)

Okay, so, last night I went into Rite-Aid, my boyfriend had to buy something for his little sister. While he did that I went crazy trying to find the restrooms there.

As I was looking every where a lady bumped into me, asking if I knew where the restrooms were, so we started looking together.

I was walking behind her and I noticed on the back of her sweater was a cross and inside the cross it read, "follow me" along with some scripture at the bottom. So of course I always think that's cool and in my head I'm just like, "yay, some more of "my people". (lol)

So we finally find the restrooms, and this is kind of awkward, but she started talking to me in the next stall. Right away I knew what was happening.

"You know, I don't ask just anybody anybody this..because, you know. Well I was in an abusive relationship with my ex and I got out of it. It's just me and my daughter living in my van."

Okay so you see what's happening... She goes on..

"I feel so low asking, you know? My parents are in the high dessert so I just need to get out there. I even have a phone I can sell to you. Or even if you want to give me your number I can pay you back."

All I said was "I might have some change to give you." I wasn't going to say much because we were in the stalls, it was so awkward for me!

So anyway, she waited for me outside. I had just gotten my tips from work that day so I had more cash on me than usual. Actually, I never have cash on me, but that's a different story.

So I pulled out my bag of tips and got all my dollars. For some reason I kept thinking, how am I going to be so selfish with this money, she needs it more than I do.

I walked outside to give her the five dollars, yes five dollars, I know it's a lot.

She was thanking me so much, and an employee walked by as I was giving her the money. She got really tense, and weird as if someone just saw her doing a drug deal. It was so weird that she made ME think I was doing some sort of deal, all I was doing was trying to help a sista out!

As the lady who left her abusive relationship walked away from me I really wanted to chase after her and pray with her. I really really wanted to do that, it felt like I should have I just didn't have the courage to do it.

So as my boyfriend and I walk out to the car, I see the lady in the parking lot, and I was watching her to see what car she was going to, maybe I could see her daughter also.

Well that wasn't the case, she walked up to a man who looked like he'd been living on the streets and went off with him.

Man, I knew I was being lied to. I'm just really upset because I belived the lady and gave her more money than people usually would give her. I just keep thinking that nothing good is going to come out of me giving her those five dollars, and that is what I feel really upset about. I really, really wish I still could have prayed with her, even though she may not be doing the right things, prayer works in mysterious ways, and I let her go.

The only thing I can do now is pray for the lady. Pray that she gets off the streets, that she uses her money wisely, and pray that God blesses her. I hope there will come a bright side to this story, I just haven't found what it is yet.

I hope that you all can pray for this lady and her partner, and the other people who make a living on the streets. I'll be back soon! :) -Yvonne.